What is the worst stereotypical cheap ALH TDI guy damage and bodge you've seen?

[Randomhomelesstdibeetlegu]

My first Golf had a hitch attached to a loose block of wood through a hole cut into the bumper cover. This car also had an undersized battery when I bought it. Oh and a hole drilled into the hatch where the washer fluid hose came through.

Found the cut valet key in the steering column of my Jetta, which was used to bypass the immo for the remote starter to work. Remote starter... on an 03 ALH.....

Literally.... Just did a 24v eurovan for a guy with a factory key taped to immobilizer ring inside dash. We removed it and I put it proper so it wouldn't leave him stranded when the tape adhesive failed.

I was shocked

 

[tgray]

I bought a BEW with an automatic that would not shift right. I find someone hit the the driver side cover and plugged up the leak with JB weld and a bolt pounded into the round hole leaking oil out. It stopped the leak but messed with a clutch operation with no oil pressure passage. The transmission actually looked like it was a brand new reman and my son is still driving it around after a new side cover. Some of these stories above are so crazy and funny I couldn't even make them up. They remind me when I was a kid of the guy who brought me a motorcycle to repair and told me it would not shift right. When I split the case apart all the small gears fell out in a pile. He just put them all back inside like you would pack them in a box and neatly bolted the entire engine back together. It actually worked fine when I put them all in the right place. True stories are stranger than fiction.

 

[Mongler98]

JB weld actually works on pinholes in power steering lines if you prep carefully and allow time for curing.

So does goop to fix split CV boots.

ive fixed a freezer condenser line with jb weld water weld putty... still keeping things cold right now...

 

[J_dude]

On my ‘87 Cabriolet project I found a lag bolt JB welded into a hole in the fuel tank

 

[gforce1108]

I had a ALH beetle come to me with no intercooler or MAP sensor. Not bypassed - just missing. He had run into something and ripped them out of the car. Just kept driving it.

 

[J_dude]

I had a ALH beetle come to me with no intercooler or MAP sensor. Not bypassed - just missing. He had run into something and ripped them out of the car. Just kept driving it.

So, the engine was sucking unfiltered air from behind the bumper?

 

[kjclow]

Mine are not VW related but here goes:
My gf in high school had an old chevy wagon with rusted out floor boards in both the driver's and passenger's foot wells. They covered the holes with cardboard and duct tape. Replaced when the cardboard got too soggy to hold.
My college room mate had a chevy chevette that had such sloppy clutch cable that he added a retaining nut to the cable and would adjust it about once a month.
I had a 77 Nova with a bad windshield wiper motor where the wipers would not turn off unless I unplugged the power to the motor. I paid something like $20 for someone to install a kill switch in through the dash. College kid with no money!
Almost forgot the neighbor that used red tape over his broken brake light housing. Dad picked him up a housing at the junk yard for a few bucks.

 

[gforce1108]

So, the engine was sucking unfiltered air from behind the bumper?

Yup - constant limp mode. Poor turbo trying to make boost vented straight to atmosphere... At least with no MAP signal the ECU wasn't commanding any boost. He bought it that way and drove it all over the place. Scary

 

[afterthisnap]

... red tape over his broken brake light housing.

There is a parked civic I drive by every day that has a translucent tupperware lid taped over thier shattered housing.