I agree, it's gotten to a very bad point with some sellers. I recall someone in eastern europe (he's on Facebook) who I asked to send me a lens for a B3 european headlight and he did, but he packed it in nothing more than a bubble mailer, so it was nothing but shards when it reached me.
In response to my outrage that he didn't pack it properly he claimed that I was being rude for complaining about it and then refused to fulfill the original agreement and quit responding to my emails about it. In the end I had no recourse since so much time had passed between his responses, which was intentional. So it would seem I was out of luck or at least reduced to posting up complaints regarding his selling practices on the groups he belongs to in FB...which I happen to belong to as well.
I've asked around locally here to see if a 5x100 donut can be found.
Steve
EDIT: it appears that this spare is a 16" version...
EDIT2: Looks like there might be one at Rockville Used Auto Parts in Rockville MD. 1-301-279-5833 stock # 790428 size is T12570R16.
It might be gone, but give them a call to see if it might be around. This would be pretty close to where you are!!